Followup with RE

We had our followup appointment with Dr. H yesterday. It went just as i had expected. He mentioned how my last cycle was good and he's upset that it didnt happen for us.
Our options are:

1) Try another cycle with him, it would be a low stim cycle. But we would only get maybe one egg, two if we were really lucky. Our chances are 5% to 10%.

2) Adption were still weighing our options with this.

3) Donor Eggs he recommends this option as our best chance we have a 50% chance with this. He gave me information on donor eggs in the states and here. He recommends Argentina as well, he is sending my information to the clinic there for them to review.

4) Try to accept that it might never happen for us. If it does ever happen naturally for us even Dr. H said it would be a mircle.

We already knew these would be our options and had decide to take a break for now. For how long its hard to say. I need to stop worrying about medications and needles. My husband lost his job two months ago so he needs to find something else so we can start saving some money. Depending on what the Argentina clinic says I would love to try this option.

I am not willing to accept option 4, somehow, some way I will be a mom. As a friend says There will always be a next step...

I AM NOT GIVING UP.

Today is my birthday. I turn 40, never would I have guessed this is were i would be at this point in my life. Nothing has gone as planned. Never have I shed so many tears.

Caring

It has been a tough week. Today I feel a little bit better, the tears have stopped althou I still get that pang of emotion when I think what lies ahead for us. I am reminded of the saying time heals all wounds. I am lucky to have some very special people in my life. I had to tell my co-workers about my journey in order to be able to take the time I need for my apppointments. They are an amazing group of women. I was suprised by this special gift from them on Wednesday.

I am at peace today, as I know that there might be a plan B for us. When I started this journey I thought that it would be easy, but it has been anything but easy. I don't know why I am taking this journey but I feel that I am not alone and will always have the support I need. I don't have any intentions of giving up somehow, some way I will be a mother.

Beta Day

Well today was beta day and of course its a BFN. I was already prepared thou i had done three pregnancy test and they were all negative. So when the nurse called and said resitantly "I don't have good news" I told her "I know" She said you tested I said "yes"

Hopefully the plan is to take a break and enjoy my life with my DH and my beautiful puppy Gizmo. I have a follow up with the RE on May 27th, funny the day before my birthday. Well see if he offers us any kind of encouragement.

So for now Life goes on!!!

ET Update

Sorry I'm a little late in posting this.

We had our day 3 ET on April 20th we transferred two perfect little embryos. The doctor was quite happy with them. I didn't ask what quality they were I didn't want to know as long as they doctor said they were good i was happy. The ET was uncomfortable i was dying to go pee but had to hold it. After the procedure the first question after I got up was "can I go go pee now" the doctor laughed. I went home to take it easy, I also took the next day off. My husband has been making sure i'm doing everything i'm suppose to and never lets me do anything i'm not allowed to do its cute in a way.

So its 6dp3dt and i've been get some cramping that comes and goes. I keep looking for symptoms, but so far that's all I have. I'm already dying to POAS but i'm going to try and hold off till after Thursday as that is two weeks after HCG Shot. I'd like to try to make it to Sunday as my beta is scheduled for May4th. It's going to be along week.

ER Done

Saturday we had our ER done. They retrieved 3 eggs froms the right and then went to the left unfortunately the follicles there had no eggs. I got the call from the nurse yesterday that all eggs were mature and had fertilized. Today my regular nurse called and said that one of the eggs had arrested. Tomorrow is day 3 and we will be proceeding with transfer.

My goal thru this whole journey is to have a child. I am hoping this works. After all everyone says that all you need is one.

IVF #2 Update - Day 13

So E2 was 3300 today, we have 6 really good follicles and two that are still ify. The plan is ER on Saturday (YEAAAAAAA)!!!!!!!! I'm so excited to have finally made it thru a cycle. I'm a little nervous about the pain. But I figure with all the injections i've been thru and all the internal ultrasounds that it might not be so bad. I trigger tonight at 9:15pm and will have ER at 9:15am on Saurday.

If your reading this please say a prayer for me. Everyone that knows that I am doing this is what I have asked of them.

Stay tuned for the ER Update!

IVF #2 Update - Day 12

So we have 8 follicles (YEAAAAA) 5 are at a good size between 1.9 & 1.7. The other 3 are still a little bit smaller around 1.1. But the plan is to do one more night of stims hoping that those three follicles grow. The nurse mentioned maybe a possible egg retrival for Saturday. You don't know how happy I was to hear those words. After 8 "cancelled" IUI and one "cancelled" IVF, we might make it thru this time. It's been small steps but I'm happy with that. Someone mentioned to me that I have a lot of patience, and I think i am very patient, this process has taught me that I am.

So now we on the road to hopefully a BFP. The rollercoaster is climbing up high, the ER will be the bump and then it'll be down to BFP.

Stay tuned for the bump.